Sept 26,2025 – One-handed

I thought the 23rd was going to be my first blog after my shoulder surgery on the 19th because it was the first day that I felt like writing after days of juggling ice packs and trying to “stay ahead of the pain”. However, when I attempted my typical start in my journal using my left hand (non-dominant), I had a new appreciation for children learning to write. It’s not just cute how messy their writing is. It’s nature. It’s a new skill to them to learn and master. I don’t know why this is a new concept to me. Did I think they came equipped and were just careless, sloppy writers?

So many times as adults (and even as we are coming of age) we balk at trying something new because we fear not being good at it especially when it doesn’t come naturally. We do understand that other people have to practice things to progress in their craft, but I think most of us think that people knew a lot before they started and were naturally good at whatever they were attempting: music, art, singing, writing, public speaking, sports….and if we aren’t instantly adept, maybe we shouldn’t even attempt something new even if it interests us. Why do we think we have to be good at everything right out of the gate? Writing left -handed would take A LOT of practice for my writing to even become legible! So, here I sit at an awkward angle trying to “type” on my keyboard without moving the position of my arm or lifting my shoulder.

So I decided to take a nap instead Tuesday (which was probably best because the focus that day may have been how frustrated I was with how I felt about my shoulder, the doctor, the pills, the everything that had interrupted my ability to be self-sufficient), but today I have so much I want to share even though I wasn’t exactly sure what or how to share it. That’s why I write in my journal first to get down my thoughts and then in a WORD doc before moving the passage into the blog for final editing. I think that’s a good sign, to be excited about something that you think God is calling you to do. I don’t think we are supposed to be dreading our callings.

I had Joyce Meyer on while I was eating lunch earlier (a sandwich that I fixed for myself one-handed with only small assists from the sling hand) and she was telling the story I’ve heard many times about trying to grow tomatoes because she thought she needed to be like her neighbor who had a beautiful garden. She said she even prayed over her tomatoes but got nothing and then heard God say that He never told her to garden so He wasn’t obligated to make it a success. Such a great perspective to grasp and to continue to be reminded of throughout my life at times when I get back into comparison or self-doubt modes.

Figuring out my identity in Christ has been a theme this week in many things I’ve watched and listened to: the Nicky Pelligino Audible book I just finished, the Better Together show on TBN, and in my small group yesterday. On Tues when I felt like writing, I figured I would for sure be going to the group on Thurs, but when I barely slept all night Tues (fighting pain between pill doses) and was tired all day Wed, I figured I’d not be able to sit still on Thursday without being a distraction to everyone (or for the pain to not be a distraction for me). I think the enemy knew I needed the love and caring from the women in this group and was effective in leading me to lean into feeling helpless and tired so I wouldn’t go. Don has been a loving, patient caregiver (once I was honest and told him he wasn’t being quite the nurse he thought he was). He’s great at doing what I ask and he gives such sweet compliments so I do recognize my blessings there, but men just have different instincts (if any) than women for caregiving. To be fair, if Don needed serious help with any of his car or remodeling projects, he would get one of his friends to step in, not me. I can help some but not like others who have similar giftings to him.

I rode with my friend, Vicki, to small group, (permission was granted to use her name which I thought I better go ahead and get since I’ve referred to her before and probably will again and having a name seems better, more personal). I first told her I wouldn’t go though so when I did say yes she had to turn around on the highway and come back for me! We were only a little late arriving but I was the distraction I feared I’d be when several had to help me with my bag that my water container had tipped over in getting my wallet, my snack, and my book wet!

The thing I realized as they were helping me is that most people (especially women) like to help each other, sometimes to the point of being controlling ha ha! But sometimes we need someone to take over in helping us (if only our grown children would more readily realize that their mothers mostly have good intentions and good ideas! I think I’ve mentioned this before, but it bears repeating, I think, that I’ve asked my children to at least say they heard me and then I won’t keep repeating myself.) We all tend to brush off good ideas from others at times thinking we can handle things ourselves in our own ways. New perspectives can be interesting and helpful – especially an ice machine that constantly runs rather than settling for having to continually swap out warm ice packs for new cold ones! I wasn’t sure I wanted to deal with the setup, but I’m so glad for my friend (who has had two shoulder surgeries) who took the time to bring it and set it up! Sometimes (most times) it is wise to at least listen to those who have gone before us.

The “Better Together” episode today was entitled, “Your Encounter with God” and they were talking about being chosen, called, and loved by God. I always enjoy watching and listening to these women talk when I tune in at times, but even the breakaway segment advertising the Takeaways show for Monday night spoke to me when they showed the guest saying, “God has something for you,” no matter your age. I was thinking about my contributions to the world (besides my precious children) when the show came back on and was very taken by what Sheila Walsh shared about what the second secretary of the UN, Dag Hammarskjold wrote, that was found in his bedside journal after he died: “For all that has been, thanks. For all that shall be, YES!” That is basically the message we heard Erika Kirk give in the eulogy for her husband, Charlie. She was grateful for all up ’til losing him and was saying yes to what God has ahead for her. May we all be so accepting and willing.

At small group yesterday, after we watched the session 3 video (A Jesus-Shaped Life), our leader directed the first question to me: “Name a part of your identity (mother, husband, daughter, teacher, violinist, runner, etc) that is essential to ‘who you are’.” I had been readjusting my ice pack and was distracted by folks refilling coffee cups so when I first heard my name I felt like a child caught in class not paying attention. My identity? I didn’t think of listening to Better Together earlier in the week when Sheila Walsh told about how she learned, during a difficult season of life, that the answer to the question of who she is, is: “a child of God.” The first thing that came to me was writer. Most everyone else said mother or caregiver or encourager etc. I identify with all those things as well, so why did writer come first to mind? That’s something to unpack with God in my quiet time especially since I haven’t really done anything spectacular with it in my life (even though I’ve tried). I guess that’s the pitiful me talking. We don’t have to be spectacular in the world’s eyes. We simply have to be willing and obedient to what God is asking. And, so, I write.

When I think about navigating being one-handed right now during my recovery, it seems a good metaphor for life. I have to look to others to help me with many things just as we should look to God to help and guide us rather than insisting on being so independent. I even heard someone on TV as I was listening today say that it’s not up to us to change ourselves. God does that. It has always bothered me when people (me as well) have said they will never change, but I guess they won’t if they don’t submit to God to do the work in them. At the end of “Better Together” today, one of the women was saying to slow down and listen to God and that He delights to tell us about us and who we are. In the closing prayer, Sheila Walsh said, “Help us when we stand in a waiting place.” Amen.