Nov 16, 2025 – Remembering
Don was out of town this weekend at his alma mater (Jacksonville State University) enjoying playing his tuba at alumni gatherings (and on the football field at halftime) and seeing family and friends. I have family and friends I could’ve called if I needed help or wanted company, but I was ok on my own. Or I was until I remembered something I used to think all these past years when my father would call on the weekends and ask, “Is anyone getting hungry?” We went out to supper with him most every night of most every weekend (as well as during the weeks at times) for a number of years. Many times, when Don was out of town and I was looking forward to some alone time without any obligations, my father would call and I would remind myself that someday he won’t be calling; and, I won’t have him to call if I do find that I want some company. Someday is now….
Every year, all my life, I have recognized Veteran’s Day especially when he moved down here from Va Beach. I tried to honor him and make the day (and/or the days leading up to it) special for him. This year…was different…without him…I avoided looking at the calendar and didn’t pay much attention to any of the events I used to look for. I’m not upset; he lived a long, productive, blessed life. As much as I complained about him at times, I just miss him. I knew I would. When photos come up on the digital frame we set up for him (that I now have in a spot which I pass by all day long), I speak to him. It hurts a little, but I think it helps a lot to see him. He was such a major part of my life these last years.
I drafted those first two paragraphs yesterday and then today happened.
Today was the first of three “At The Movies” sermons at Church of the Highlands. Because they preach from portions of real movies, they can’t broadcast online so “living room church” was not an option. Even with Don’s late arrival home last night, we opted for the 8am service since the later ones tend to get really crowded. We got our popcorn and Cokes and settled into the upper section as the music began to play (loudly – which is one of the reasons we opt for watching online). Well into the second song, Don pointed out a man in a wheelchair just below us in the last row of the floor section and said, “Makes me miss your dad.” As I looked down and saw what looked like an older man, like Daddy, sitting at the end of the row, Don continued, “You should’ve seen all of the adjusting they did to remove a chair to fit him in the row and everyone moved down.” After that, I couldn’t not see the man as I thought of all of the many events through the years that we had made sure my father got to enjoy.
And then the tears started. I couldn’t stop them. I remembered the pack of tissues that I’d grabbed when I changed from the bigger purse to the smaller one. I was planning to only take my wallet, lip balm, and phone, but that small, still voice said, “Get the tissue too.” I don’t have a cold and there’s not much room in the purse; but, sure, I’ll grab the packet. I just held the tissue at first, only needing to dab my eyes a little; but, I soon became overwhelmed by my emotions. I was concerned that the woman right behind us would think Don had upset me when he spoke to me so I leaned back into him and said, “I can’t sit here and look at that man.” He moved closer to me and, when he put his arm around me, my shoulders started to convulse and I was crying loud enough to hear myself. I was glad in that moment that the music was drowning me out!
I took notes on my phone during the service and found myself wishing that I’d listened again to that small, still voice that said, “take the information packet” that they had at the door. They weren’t just freely offering them like usual and I didn’t have a pen with me so I missed out on the blank page they have in the packet that I could have taken notes on. When I got home, I was sad about that because the notes were gone from my phone. It has been acting up lately and erasing things. So frustrating. I’ll go from memory here…and from my heart.
The movie was about a deep-water diver in 2012 who repaired pipelines in the North Sea who got stranded 300 feet below the surface. Our pastor wove a very meaningful message from it. He equated the lost, alone, desperate feeling of the diver to when any of us go through dark times and we feel like we won’t make it. In our own strength, we likely won’t. In the movie he had to rely on other people to save him, but even the man who was pulling him up from the depths had to rely on another man encouraging and guiding him.
At one point the second rescuer, who seemed to be in some sort of below surface pod, could tell that the first man was wearing himself out as he was pulling on a line hand over hand with the unconscious man strapped to him. He reminded him to use the power of the swell of the water (there was a raging storm that the ship above was battling trying to stay in place for the rescue). He said to pull when he felt that power and rest in between. One of the things that drove this man to persist in the precarious rescue was a previous rescue attempt years before that haunted him in which he was ordered to end the search for the body of an overboard crew member due to the increasing expense of the mission.
Despite the storm conditions they were working under, he (and apparently everyone on board the ship above the surface) vowed to not leave the man behind. God does the same with us; and, as our pastor pointed out, we should keep striving to overcome, but not in our own strength. We need to lean on the Power that is available to us. We need to remember this in all situations of life, even in momentarily being overcome by grief while missing a loved one. I couldn’t sing the third song with everyone, but I let the words and their meaning minister to me as my emotions settled down. (Having to sing three songs in a row always irks me a bit, but today I was very grateful for the cover and power of that third song.)
We went to breakfast after church and as I was walking through the restaurant a few words of the song playing over the speaker spoke to my heart, “See you on the other side.” On the way home, we passed a truck with huge, long logs which Don said were for telephone poles. When I asked what kind of tree they use, he said, “Sounds like a question your dad would ask.” I googled and told him that the main type used is the Yellow Pine and Don said, “Mmmm. Interesting,” which is exactly what Daddy would have said. In that moment I realized that part of the reason I was so emotional in church was because of Don saying he missed my father! I wasn’t alone in the missing and I wasn’t alone in all of the years of caring for him. I had a man who sometimes was even more willing than I was to make sure my father got to his weekend suppers and to all of the events that weren’t all that easy to get him to. I’m grateful for the parents God gave me and am beyond blessed that He brought Don into my life!
Power – Joyce bases today’s devotion on Matthew 6:27 as she talks about worry. “Worrying does us absolutely no good. It doesn’t change anything, and we waste time by being upset over things we can’t do anything about.” The crew of that ship and the two rescuers in the pod below the water proved that. Worrying would have wasted precious minutes of the stranded man’s potential of being saved. Joyce continues, “Jesus essentially tells us to calm down (see John 14:27) and cheer up (see John 16:33). I believe these two things combined serve as a one-two knockout punch to the devil. When you realize you can’t fix everything, you calm down; and when you know God can, you cheer up!” We do what we can do and trust God with the rest.
Streams – “Are we willing to compete for God’s best, with the knowledge that the best things are always achieved by the most difficult paths? We must endure steep mountains, dense forests, and the enemy’s chariots of iron, since hardship is the price of the victor’s coronations. Arches of triumph are not made of rose blossoms and strands of silk but of hard blows and bloody scars. The very hardships you are enduring in your life today may have been given to you by the Master, for the express purpose of enabling you to win your crown. Therefore do not always look ahead to your tomorrow’s for some ideal situation…. Rise today to face the circumstances in which the Providence of God has placed you.”
JC – “As you look at the day before you, you see a twisted, complicated path, with branches going off in all directions. You wonder how you can possibly find your way through that maze. Then you remember the One who is with you always, holding you by your right hand…. As you look again at the path ahead you notice that a peaceful fog has settled over it, obscuring your view. You can see only a few steps in front of you, so you turn your attention more fully to Me and begin to enjoy My presence. The fog is a protection for you…. Someday the fog will no longer be necessary, for you will have learned to keep your focus on Me and on the path just ahead of you.” The stranded man was in a fog of sorts and had to turn his attention to the resources he had: 10 minutes of backup air and a torch to find his way to the agreed upon meeting spot where the rescuer found him unconscious. He kept his focus on the path in front of him and didn’t waste energy (or worry) on what was beyond the immediate moments and tasks.
Prevail #320 – Titus 3:4-5 – “When God our Savior revealed his kindness and love, he saved us, not because of the righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy.” Larson writes, “By His mercy He saved us. But out of the overflow of God’s grace, Paul also charges us to help those in need, do excellent work, and steward well the call set before us.” The crew helping that stranded man risked their own lives and worked to save him not because of his past service but because of his humanity and their mercy. They “steward[ed] well the call” set before them. Faith is not conveyed in the movie, but I have to believe there were many calling on God during that dangerous and frightening night.
[Note: If you want to see an impressive band, you should make your way to Jacksonville Alabama to see The Marching Southerners. I promise it will be worth the trip!]
